The PUMPKIN WHITE CHOCOLATE CHIP HEAVEN MORE SEX YUM FREEDOM GIMME LOVE COOKIES entry did exactly what I expected it to - it caused a stir and made everyone terribly envious of me for having so many cookies all to myself. (Well, I gave away two of them, but only in exchange for sex.)
(I'll leave it up to you to decide if I'm kidding.)
I was going to post a picture of the cookies, but then I realized no photograph could ever capture the texture. The smell. And the exquisite taste. Of. The cookies. Because I know you're all picturing a little round piece of pumpkin heaven in your mind's eye, and it trumps any actual photographic evidence of cookie perfection I could provide. The human imagination is a powerful thing. It's sort of like how everyone was super excited for GODZILLA before it came out, but once we actually saw him and how ugly and lamely iguana-like he looked, we were all grateful Spielberg decided to have the T-Rex go to San Diego and steal G's thunder after all.
So here is a picture of where the cookies once lived, before they took up residence in my belly. Today is a day to remember said cookies and commemorate them for what they gave us: a few brief seconds of bliss. It's the end of an era.
Whoops, did I say "us" up there? I meant me. Only me. For I alone know God. And He is a Pumpkin White Chocolate Chip Cookie.
Mmm...I think I'll go buy more. ALL of them. And start a cult. I will be Cookie God, and you shall be my followers, begging me for crumbs.
Oh dear, I'm about to get really fat, aren't I?