Rob, you may have suffered at the hands of an imaginary theatrical creation (you know, the Phantom)... but I think I was just slayed by someone who actually, tragically exists.I've never heard of this boy, perhaps you have? He's apparently a go-go boy who dances like he's in the beginning tremors of a seizure.
"He tends to dance in fits and jerks, his arms stiffly at his sides except when he suddenly draws one hand up towards the side of his face. He moves around a lot when he dances, his legs following his upper body, which spasms rhythmically to a beat slightly different than that of the music."No thank you. I'll stick with my twinky go-gos with their casual pot addictions, pet snakes, and new baby puppies.
Max might also be an artist.
"His "zine" is Scorcher, a compendium of his autobiographical porn stories. He also writes a blog, This Is Fag City, and a monthly horoscope column under a pseudonym, for "a free New York publication" whose name he won't reveal. He is also a performance artist, a singer, a songwriter and an accompanist."He can certainly give my productivity a run for its money. Even though in the article I read, he doesn't seem to really be doing much besides getting drunk, falling down stairs, and begging Zachary to treat him nicely in print.
I can tell you this: he lives in Brooklyn, which already makes me cautious. I don't like that borough. Once upon a time I universally detested all places reachable by bridge and/or tunnel from Mannahatta. I have since grown to adore Astoria. To date, I still despise Brooklyn.
Anyway. Max Steele, this celebrity I have never heard of, is "profiled" in a new article penned by my pal Zachary Woolfe, in the latest edition of The Awl, which is some type of an online pub with a really creative, sorta drugged out "about" section.
Zachary and I worked with many moons ago back when the both of us had pseudonyms and took it to the gays by making fun of their funny profiles or photos on Manhunt for the blog Hunters and Gatherers. And in his article, he followed Mr. Steele around from party to meeting to party to back of a cab where he's making out with some other gay guy.
Indeed it seems like Zachary went through hell - just read the article and feel the Hipster-induced coma that begins to overtake you around the time Max takes Zachary to a pot-smoke-choked magazine meeting. Seriously, people like Max Steele MAY BE THE REASON why I refuse to spend more than the least amount of time possible in Brooklyn.
Does Max ever come into NYC? It doesn't seem like it. The closest he gets in the article is Sugarland, which is apparently a "tourist trap" gay bar meant to give New Yorkers a taste of Brooklyn. Well let me tell you this about Sugarland. I went once and it was so Brooklyn that I could barely get drunk in peace, and basically ran, screaming, back to the train en route to Hell's Kitchen hoping that the egos and button-collar shirts would save me from all of those piercings and creative smatterings of facial hair.
So indulge, won't you? Take a scary trip to Brooklyn, and spend a dreadful 24 hours with Go-Go Boy of the Damned, Max Steele. And then thank Zachary. It's because he spent a full day with Max that we may thankfully never have to.
Check out the article, "'Almost' 'Famous': 24 Hours with Max Steele".
xoJR
why did you write this? It's a lot of words wasted on someone you say you find unpleasant.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm not sure why I read it. Maybe it was just because I wanted to find out if you were going to actually come to some substantive point or if your plan was just to act like kind of a bitch all over the internet.
Either way, this was a waste of time for both of us. Congratulations.
Lauren
First of all, yr obviously an idiot.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who makes a statement like "Brooklyn... I don't like the borough" Hate to break the news to you that Brooklyn is an epicenter of exciting art, music, people, people, spaces, cultures, and history. Obviously yr one of those people that's soo threatened by the Brooklyn scene that you can't even take the time to weed out the good from the amazing. YR LOSS. fine.
But alas, I'm not going to spend more time telling you why you're a loser. I will say that this article was pretty shocking. To be honest, you should know Max Steele, and if you don't, I think it says more about you than anyone or anything else. YR LOSS. FINE.
You sound threatened, insecure and I'm glad you stay clear of Brooklyn. Also, it's great to know that you a) believe everything you read b) are incredibly judgemental and C) write a shitty article based on another shitty article that you've believed.
A lot of people work really hard at what they do, whether it be producting ZINES!!!!! REAL ZINES WON'T YOU BELIEVE IT!?!? or performing, or writing, or creating art, music, etc...
Why you do something worthwhile rather than writing mean articles about people you don't know- it's counterproductive and ignores that face that it takes people a long time and a lot of courage to make/do things.
In closing, I hope you never see me in public when i'm pot-smoke-choked cos i'll pot-smoke-choke YA!
PS- you should spellcheck. THNX
xxPAPS!
Max is a good person. And congratulations -- mentioning his name actually got someone to read your blog.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, yr obviously an idiot.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who makes a statement like "Brooklyn... I don't like the borough" Hate to break the news to you that Brooklyn is an epicenter for exciting art, music, people, people, spaces, cultures, and history. Obviously too threatened by the scene that you can't even take the time to weed out the bad from the amazing. YR LOSS. fine.
But alas, I'm not going to spend more time telling you why you're a mean loser. I will say that this article was pretty shocking. To be honest, you should know Max Steele, and if you don't, I think it says more about you than anyone or anything else. YR LOSS. FINE.
You sound threatened, insecure and I'm glad you stay clear of Brooklyn. Also, it's great to know that you a) believe everything you read b) are incredibly judgemental and C) write a shitty article based on another shitty article that you've believed.
A lot of people work really hard at what they do, whether it be producting ZINES!!!!! REAL ZINES WON'T YOU BELIEVE IT!?!? or performing, or writing, or creating art, music, etc...
Why you do something worthwhile rather than writing mean articles about people you don't know- it's counterproductive and ignores that fact that it takes people a long time and a lot of courage to make/do things. BULLY
In closing, I hope you never see me in public when i'm pot-smoke-choked cos i'll pot-smoke-choke YA!
xxPAPS!
Please stay in Manhattan.
ReplyDeletehow can anyone take your opinion seriously when you make sweeping generalizations about an entire borough, a borough you're too xenophobic to even visit for more than one night at a trashy gay bar.
ReplyDeletecongratulations, you're the reason people hate manhattan. have fun with your poppers and hair gel and "ethnic" choker necklaces.
Attention commenters:
ReplyDeleteI was hoping that the line: "ran, screaming, back to the train en route to Hell's Kitchen hoping that the egos and button-collar shirts would save me from all of those piercings and creative smatterings of facial hair."
Would clue everyone in that this post is not meant to be taken seriously.
Everyone should relax. I responded to the article - which indeed does NOT paint Max Steele to be a fantastic fellow.
Do I know Max? No I don't. Would I meet him? Sure.
Do I hate Brooklyn? It certainly has not treated me nicely the ten or so times I ventured out.
Does that mean Brooklyn sucks? No. It means I don't like it.
Everyone is entitled to their opinions. And judging from your anti-Manhattan commentary, you're just as guilty... just from the other side of the tunnel and bridge.
xoJR
i grew up on the upper eas side and can attest to the fact that it blows loads and anyone who enjoys spending time there (my father included) is fucking loser.
ReplyDelete