Monday, October 26, 2009

Justin: Are you ASKING for a Gay Orgy?

I just needed to quickly air my grievances about some misleading advertising. I came across this banner advertisement on the blog Queerty (which I regular read and pitch stories to). The first thing, believe it or not, that caught my eyes was NOT the near naked men ogling each other.

No, it was the logo "THEhotel," followed by the ogling oglers. Why? Because I had BEEN to THEhotel, it's the neighboring obelisk right beside Mandalay Bay casino in Las Vegas. Seeing this logo, paired with two men about to lock in a slobbering 69 registered as odd to me.

Why was Mandalay Bay and their classy establishment, theHOTEL advertising gay sex? Did Mandalay Bay open up a GAY STEAM ROOM at the hotel? Surely, the name BATHHOUSE certainly led one to expect that there would be rooms full of rump-rapture to be found.

Of course I clicked on the ad (no judgment).

What did I find? Lube recommendations? Videos of 88-ways? Not quite. The description of the BATHHOUSE reads as:
Simple elegance defines the elite bathhouse spa. The healing, cleansing and rejuvenation qualities of water, the elixir of life, is highlighted through pools of varying temperatures, exotic baths, and a flowing waterfall.

Unlike any of the spas you'll find in Las Vegas, the bathhouse features uniquely European styling with slate walls, marble floors and breathtaking water features throughout. The 14,000-square-foot spa offers steam rooms and saunas, as well as twelve (12) treatment rooms where you can enjoy massages, wraps and facials. We also offer a full salon and the gym, a complete workout facility.
So it's not a gay sex bathhouse... it's a fucking spa! Of course, this isn't a bad thing. Gay men love their spas. But something tells me that anyone who clicked on this ad were waiting to find out how quickly they could deep dick the toothpick-skinny gaysian in the background. AKA: not delivering on user expectations.

Come on, Mandalay Bay! How could you lead poor, Queerty-reading, undersexed gay men to a page they THINK is for a gay sex bathhouse, only to so-quickly let them down? Nay, I have a better idea. CONTINUE the ruse... make them think it's a bathhouse until they book their stay, their flight, and come out there!

Here, I've already helped you some by doing a quick edit of your web copy... what do you think?
An eternity of erections defines the elite bathhouse spa. The healing, cleansing and rejuvenating qualities of hot, creamy, slightly salty man protein, the elixir of life, is flowing through sweating men of varying size, shape, and kink.

Unlike any of the full-blown orgy houses you'll find in Las Vegas, the bathhouse features uniquely European Europeans with slate wall-like abs, marble-smooth asses and breathtaking water sports skills. The 14,000-square-feet of dick can be enjoyed in steam rooms and saunas, as well as twelve (12) treatment rooms where you can enjoy rectal massages, teabaggings and facials. We also offer a full salon and
the gym, a complete workout facility... where you can also fuck.
Sure, it's not Don Draper-quality stuff... but at least it keeps up the act long enough to get someone to click on the "make a reservation" button.

xoJR

3 comments:

  1. I came across this same advertisement on another gay blog and had the same thought -- "WTF? Mandalay Bay?!" In googling for more info, I hit your blog.

    I love your quick edit!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ha ha ... same thing happened to me ... i spotted the add on Logo's webpage ... and couldn't believe the ad was legit. thanks for the blog ... glad i'm not the only one who was thrown off by the misleading ad.

    ReplyDelete