Justin: Play Playboy off, Keyboard Cat!

Oh this is sad. If The Wrap's forecast comes true, we may be seeing the end of a heterosexual era soon enough: it looks like Playboy magazine may fold.

That's right. Playboy magazine. The thing I used to disinterestedly flip through as a youngster who was trying to make boobs work for him. No more sexy cartoons! No more tech reviews! And where will edgy writers publish edgy short fiction?

"Raw numbers: Total print and digital revenues fell about $10 million during the quarter to $22.9 million, down from $32.7 million in 2008 (this was due, in part, to Playboy combining its July and August issues).

Meanwhile, net licensing revenue was $8.7 million, down from $10.4 million last year. But this part of the business will probably be up year-over-year, executives said – and there are interesting projects in the works, like a partnership with Coty to develop a Playboy scent. (Just what dude would admit to using Playboy cologne is yet to be determined.)

The problem is the magazine itself."

It will be weird to picture a world without Playboy magazine - the one porno mag that wasn't TOO smutty to own. It was like Martha Stewart Living for dudes, with vaginas (and not Martha's...) What will conflicted gay boys have to look at to convince them that they're not in the mood for fish for the rest of their lives? What will straight boys be able to look at together while jacking off before realizing they're gay? What will high schoolers sneak into school and sell looks-at for 50 cents a minute?

Now all we'll have left are the SMUTTY porns. The cheaply produced rags that advertise horny hermaphroditic housewives humping henna headed hammer-toed hooligans. And we'll have to kiss the glossy pages of something that straddled (haha) the line between dirty, sexy nakedness and a great judge of the best pair of stereo speakers.

Oh Playboy, will you, too, fold? Much like Modern Bride and Gourmet? Or perhaps will you hire those Modern Brides, grab some foods from Gourmet, and find a whole new world of fetish to enter into and turn your profit up once more?

Time will only tell, I guess.