See Taylor Lautner's package and Nick Jonas' Booty!

Oh, hot male celebrities that gay men want to have sex with - will you never learn? You need to consult your wardrobe specialists EVERY TIME you go out.

Why? Because if the pants you're wearing are TOO tight, then we get a perfect image of your butt as though you're not wearing any pants at all, as shown here in this behind-the-Jonas shot of Nick in a baseball uniform...

But don't think you're off the hook yet, hot guy stud superstars. Your clothing can't be TOO LOOSE either, because then you end up like Twilight hottie Taylor Lautner, who's basically gone and shown the entire free world the outline of his lil' werewolf...

WOWZA!

Let's all go on ahead and unleash a howl of gratitude to Taylor and Nick for giving us just THAT much more material to work with for when we close our eyes and imagine them in precarious positions beneath and/or above us.

- Justin Luke