STILL MORE Lame Things Gay Promoters Do - DJ EDITION: A +1 Guest Post

The following post wasn't written by me, but it WAS inspired by me! (And by my promoter buddy Daniel Nardicio). Today's post is a guest blog written by sexy east coast DJ Jason Royce. 

If you party in DC or Philly or Jersey, chances are you've shaken your booty to his mixed and mashed tunes at LEAST a bunch of times.

In today's post, Jason continues where I left off yesterday with another rant about the shady/questionable behaviors of gay nightlife promoters. Let's just call this the "DJ Edition," shall we?

In the end, all I can say is: PREACH!


Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

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Justin struck a nerve with me yesterday when he posted his own followup to Daniel Nardicio's recent post for the Village Voice called "The 10 Lamest Things Party Promoters Do." Justin's post, "Ten MORE Lame Things That Gay Party Promoters Do," definitely hit the nail on the head as far as annoying, and downright stupid, things that promoters tend to do. And in all fairness, Justin admitted to fucking up a time or two and committing some of the very sins he has on his list. All promoters do it.

But as I was reading I couldn't help but think of a few things he may have missed. Maybe he's never been dumb enough to do some of the things I was thinking about? Maybe he did and just forgot about them? Either way, I certainly have seen some promoters over the years do some ridiculous things in order to make their party, the club, and more importantly their egos, seem larger than life.

Lets first go with the topic of DJs, shall we?

Tonight's party features "TOP RATED," "SUPERSTAR," "#1," "AWARD WINNING," and the one that irks me the most of all "PRODUCER/REMIXER," deejay so and so. Have you ever had to ask yourself, "Who?"

Top rated according to what? Did this unknown DJ somehow beat out Tiesto or Calderone for this year's top spot on the DJ Times (or pick another reputable industry mag) Top 100 list? What the fuck does Top Rated even mean?

Superstar? Is he a superstar in your own mind because you think he's cute or looks good when he deejays shirtless but cant mix two songs to save his life? What basement did this kid come from?

Did he really work with GaGa or Katy Perry IN the studio on a single or remix? Or did he use his newly purchased Mac in his bedroom using someone else's loops and a downloaded a capella?

The point is this: Every club has a DJ.

Stop over-hyping the DJ and be honest about their resume and experience and don't set people up for what could be a shitty night of music. DJs, especially new DJs desperate for a club gig, exaggerate about their experience and lie about their past gigs all the time just to get a gig, and if a promoter falls for those lies, and then advertise a "SUPERSTAR DJ" only to have the worst train crash accident in history occur at their party...well, you see where I'm going with this.

And here is another thought: If you, the promoter, are going to hire a DJ based solely off the demo they emailed you (which of course sounds perfect because they made it using a computer), and if you've not done your homework on them and have never, ever heard them play live to a packed club before, you'll have only yourself to blame when the boo's drown out the terrible music on the dancefloor.

The same can be applied to dancers and bartenders and performers/drag queens. "THE CITY'S HOTTEST" so and so. Hottest by whose standards? Did the HOT police certify someone with a stamp of approval? Everyone has different tastes in dancers, for example, so don't advertise HOT HOT HOT when you may have UGLY MESS UGLY on every bar and dance box.

The same goes for bartenders. Don't advertise hot bartenders when you have nothing but old, tired, career bartenders with wrinkles who hate their lives because they've gone nowhere. Dancers and bartenders add to ambiance and we all love eye candy, but please let people decide for themselves if the sights are worthy of coming back next week to hopefully get that hotties number.

Lets move on to:

Promoters who don't provide and/or make sure staff (especially straight staff at a traditionally straight club hosting a gay party) are welcoming, courteous and professional. We've all ran into this problem at some point. If you, as a promoter, cannot negotiate things like this with the venue, then you better make sure you have enough gay staff to make up the difference, or move on to another club that understands and is willing to work with you to accommodate your patrons. Enough said.

VIP: Everyone is a paying customer and wants to have a good time. A promoter who offers VIP better be prepared to understand they risk alienating other customers by treating a few "elite" people in special ways. A promoter who puts himself behind a velvet rope at a table with champagne and some trashy men/women, or in the center of the room like he's a king, and/or only allows his friends into a certain part of the club, not only looks like a douchebag but the arrogance is a huge turnoff to people who paid to get into the party to have a good time.

And did I mention these are the same people who ultimately helped that same douchy promoter make a few extra bucks at the end of his fabulous night? Everyone should be treated equally regardless of their "cuteness" or tight fitting jeans they are wearing that night. If a promoter thinks his "friends" are going to come back next week and actually pay to get in along with the "uglies" then he's sadly mistaken.

The same can be applied to promoters (or a drag queen with a clipboard and "list") who like to walk outside the club and pull certain boys from the line to get in for free ahead of others who have been waiting longer, with money. If people are willing to wait, and willing to pay, they don't need to be pissed off because Studio 54 suddenly reopened. Atleast make everyone wait in line and then take care of friends extremely discretely at the cash window.

And finally:

Don't be "that" promoter who gets trashed part way through the night and cant see their event through to the end in a responsible way. Or the promoter who disappears for hours at a time only to reappear later with coke residue under their nose smelling of poppers, lube and tequila. Not cute, and definitely not professional. I'm paying to come to your party, so the least you can do is work your fucking ass off, all night, to make sure I have the best time ever with friends.

I'll be back next week if you can get it right, douchebag.



- Jason