Go-Go Boys: Coming Soon to a DVD Near You

The second I saw the trailer for Go-Go Crazy, I was sold.

Wouldn't you be?

First: it comes from the creators of THE BIG GAY MUSICAL, which was a campy-good gay time for all who experienced it.

Second: it is filled with gorgeous gays in close to no clothing.

Third: Hedda Lettuce is in there!

The premise sounds interesting, too: it's a Mockumentary, which I've loved since the glory days of Christopher Guest. And yes, I know this probably won't be as hilarious and brilliant as Waiting for Guffman or Best In Show, but that's fine. As long as I get a few chuckles while staring at well-hung, hairless boy toys, I'm good to go.

The official synopsis is:
Welcome to Go Go Crazy: a contest where talent and ambition take a backseat to speedos and desperation. Five shameless contestants with little to gain and nothing to lose take to the stage in a gay nightclub for a chance to achieve go go boy glory and a $1000 cash prize. On the judging panel are a burned out porn star, a Celine Dion “embodier,” and the raunchy nightclub owner - all of whom threaten to steal the spotlight from the fame-hungry, back-stabbing contestants.

Starring iconic drag comedian Hedda Lettuce, gay adult film star Jake Steel, and some sexy broadway actors, Go Go Crazy is a hilarious, outrageous mockumentary from director Fred M. Caruso (The Big Gay Musical). With a little sex, sabotage, and dirty tricks, this movie will turn you on, bend you over with laughter, and then give you a happy ending.

And the cast? Well hello there... not a bad gay group!

• Hedda Lettuce
• Michael Cusumano (Chicago on Broadway)
• Nick Kenkel (Catch Me If You Can, Evita)
• Eric Spear (Movin Out National Tour)
• Paul Cereghino
• Rick Crom (Urintown, The Chapelle Show)
• Christina Bianco (Forbidden Broadway)
• Derek St Pierre (Memphis, Rock of Ages)
• Ryan Windish
• and Jake Steel (PORN!)
  

You can bet your bottom I'll be buying a copy of GO GO CRAZY. If you wanna join me for a screening at my place, drop me a line!

Check out the trailer for yourself below.

- Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

EXCLUSIVE! Gay Model Peter Picciano Strips Down!

I have very sexy friends. This is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because I get to look at them, and a curse because I do not look LIKE them. But you know what? Being able to look AT them makes up for any self-esteem issues that come as a result of not looking LIKE them.

One such sexy friend is my bud, Peter Picciano. You probably saw him on the cover of NEXT magazine a few weeks back. You also no doubt see him alongside my best friend and brother from a different mother, Dougie Meyer over at Splash Bar every week.

Below are EXCLUSIVE BRAND NEW SUPER SEXY photos of my gorgeous gay model friend taken by photographer Rick Day.

Are you model scouting, or a photographer who'd like to shoot this steaming pile of Boner-Making Meat?

Drop Peter a line on his fan page right here.

Now, no more words. I'll let Peter's pix do the talking.

xo Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

Britney, Gaga, Beyonce, Madonna, and Katy Perry Come to Times Square!

Drag queens are nothing new to New York City. We're the Drag Capitol of the world! Or not... I have nothing with which to back that statement up. But stick with me!

It would take a PRETTY BIG DEAL to make a Drag Dent in the gay New York scene, don't you agree? Well I think the big deal has come to town, boys. Enter ICONS - the newest off-broadway spectacular at the Snapple Theater near Times Square.

It combines three things gays love: pop divas, hot nearly naked men AND super talented drag queens!

Think about it: Beyonce, Katy Perry, Britney Spears, Lady Gaga... all played by boys and surrounded by boys!

Yeah. It's amazing. I had to get the scoop on this new show, so I got in touch with the power gays behind the scenes, Michael Duling and Tom D'Angora, to ask them a few questions.

Check it out, and then check ICONS out by getting tickets here!

- Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

For those +1s who aren't in the know, what is ICONS?
ICONS is the gayest show on earth...next to Hugh Jackman on Broadway (he does do a Dreamgirls medley).  Its a drag dance extravaganza, a nostalgic trip through diva pop culture, and basically just a loud and rowdy good time.  The show starts with Tina and Cher and works its way through Gaga and Beyonce.  You'll see Madonna do some Blond Ambition, Britney dance her ass off, Whitney being Whitney, and a bunch of sweaty hot back up dancers.  You'll know every word to every song, recognize every costume, and the super fans will probably know all the moves.  The show basically recreates your favorite videos, performances, and "iconic" moments.  The show's designed for the ADD generation, so it never gets boring, its loud, hyper-theatrical, and just a lot of fun!

And how did ICONS get its start?
We produce Naked Boys Singing in Provincetown and the owner of the venue asked us to whip together a drag show.  In all honesty, producing a drag show sounded punishing, and what do you do in Provincetown that hasn't been done?  Tom came up with the idea to keep it really young, dance heavy, and celebrity based.  Most drag in Ptown is comedy based (Varla, Miss Richfield, Dina Martina, etc) so we thought this would at least be different.  Then we sat down and just said, "if we went to a cheap-ass lip-syncing drag show what would we want to see?"  Madonna in a pink cone bra was the very first thing we knew we needed to do, Janet had to do Rhythm Nation, and we should throw some comedy in, maybe a funny Whitney Houston bit, and it just started flowing.

We knew we hated drag-impressions that just kind of did the choreography and wore a similar looking outfit.  We knew we wanted it to be exact recreations of the "iconic" moments.  We mapped out the show in about 30 minutes and it was set, we never changed one thing.  We cast two kids (one of whom had never done drag before, the other who was already doing Gaga-drag) and asked a few of the Naked Boys to be back up dancers. During rehearsals we thought it was a train wreck.  None of us knew what we were creating.  We were going to postpone a few days to get it in shape but decided to test it out in front of an audience on our scheduled opening just to see what worked and what didn't.  We opened, the audience was insane, and within a week we were selling out left and right and adding shows like crazy.  Somehow on opening night it all came together in the most magically fabulous way I've ever witnessed.

What type of audience is ICONS for?
The audience for ICONS is sooooooo diverse.  Icons is honestly for everyone.  From gay guys who have ever made a mix tape, taught themselve the choreo to Oops I Did It Again, and remember when Madonna ruled the earth are the best audience members.  They sing along, scream, get drunk, and have a great time.  Middle aged women always love it.  One of our biggest fans (who's seen the show at least ten times) is in her sixties and she brought a group of twelve retired nurses to our final performance in Ptown this year! Tom's stepdad is a retired Cape Cod police sergeant and has been 5 times.  We've also have some young fans, some of Gaga's dancers came to the show and then a big group came later this year who were recommended the show by Gaga's dancers, and oddly enough straight guys LOVE it.  The show is for anyone who wants to have fun.  Its just about letting your hair down, having a drink, and getting excited when your favorite song starts!

With all the shows currently on and off Broadway, why should we see ICONS?
You can see both.  We're late night.  Go see your Broadway show and then stop by ICONS afterwards.  We're bringing a little late night debauchery back to Times Square!

What is your favorite segment of the show, and why?
The opening is great because you can feal the anticipation in the room.  The Britney Spears number is f*cking EPIC, Gaga is fun because we change it all the time to keep it current, and the audience always loves Whitney.  The show is so fast paced that it is impossible to pick one moment.  Each moment flows into the other really nicely so you kind of need all the pieces to create the larger picture. 

What was your biggest challenge in bringing ICONS to Off-Broadway from P-Town?
We're filling a void that NYC didn't realize it had.  We're doing a late night drag show in Times Square.  How do we get the tourists in?  How do we convince the gays that this isn't your typical bar drag act?  We know people love the show, and we get so many returning audience members, but will the show fly in NYC?  What makes the show popular is the merging of the classic drag show with the classic theatrical formula. Icons is hyper theatrical to say the least. When producing shows on or off Broadway there's at least a certain protocol... this we're just kind of making up as we go along.

What changes have been made between the two versions?
Well, we always try to go bigger, better, and louder!  And, we can't ruin any major details.  We've done two different versions of the show in Ptown and this is basically a mash-up of those two versions.  We've also added a few more back-up dancers which gives us more stage looks to play with. 

Who is YOUR favorite real-life diva, and why?
Michael Jackson is hands-down the greatest Icon in history, but now it's Gaga, duh.  Why?  Because she's Lady Gaga.  Also,   We've always liked artists who were strong willed, made bold decisions, and didn't try to fit into the pop machine.  We like artists who are their own creations. Tom would like to add that on a global scale Hillary Clinton is his favorite diva, god love her.

Which real-life diva are you getting tired of, and why?
Since this show is all about celebrating the talents of these divas it would not be very polite to focus on the negative.  In each of their hey-days the divas we do in ICONS couldn't be touched and that's how we like to remember them.  They've all had some ups-and-downs but everyone in our show deserves the title of "ICON" for a reason.

When and where is ICONS performed? And how can we get tickets?
Fridays and Saturday nights at 10:45pm.  We're at The Snapple Theater Center, 1627 Broadway at 50th St.  You can get tickets through Ticketmaster and go to our website ICONSNYC.com for info, pics, videos, etc.  Also, join the facebook page "ICONS-Provincetown" where you can see all the videos and photos that our fabulous "iFans" have taken and uploaded.

TheBlackoutBlog’s Top 5 Grindr DON’Ts: A +1 Guest Post

The following post is so awesome that I'm not even going to waste time introducing it. It comes from my good buddy Kareem over at The Blackout Blog. If you like it as much as I do, be sure to hop over and check out the rest of his stuff!

xo 
Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

Grindr is the leading location-based service for gay social networking, boasting over 3 million users. The gist: you make a profile (with text and a picture), and it gives you a grid of other users' profiles and distances from you. It can be fun to see who's on and who's near (OMG, I had no idea my neighbor was gay!), but, as happens when humans are added to the equation, users don't always get the best use out of the service, often to the chagrin of their fellow users.

So here's a quick guide of things NOT to do when you're on Grindr.

Yawn.

DON'T greet more than once in a short period of time. A greeting is meant to initiate a conversation. Since Grindr keeps a log of your conversation, keep it continuous. Another greeting only slows the conversation down.

Endless wit.

Instead: Try asking an open-ended question that will elicit a response, like "How was your weekend?" or "I'm slammed at work. How about you?"

Things I do at the beach: tan, swim, get paid for sex, water ski.

DON'T expect to get much response without a picture. Several profiles explicitly say something to the effect of "I won't respond without a [face] pic." The point of the app is to encourage interaction with people, and part of that interaction is visual, even if it's not based on attraction.

In a Shakespearian sort of way.

Instead: Not into broadcasting your countenance to all of Grindr? Try creating mystery/intrigue by using part of your face, your body or a thought-provoking image. Send a face pic once you've established trust and/or interest. Or just post a fucking face pic.

Believe me, I've looked.

DON'T give up on trying to meet new guys because you're not getting messages while at home or at work. If you've been on Grindr for a while in these places, you’re likely developing what I call Geo-Grindr Fatigue, which basically means you've exhausted your resources in that area.

Glad we got that out of the way.

Instead: Use the block feature. Let's face it: if he hasn't talked to you after a month of seeing you in his grid, chances are he never will. So block him and everyone else you're not talking to day in and day out. New guys will show up in your grid, replacing those you're not talking to, and you'll get more use out of the app. Also, don’t forget to sign on when you’re in a new neighborhood! Grindr guys love fresh meat faces.

Sometimes three question marks just isn't enough.

DON'T try to post nude pics, speedo pics, underwear pics (even the waistband), bulge pics or pics that show that impressive imprint you make in your favorite pair of mesh shorts. You'll be cropped, asked to pick a new pic or banned from the app altogether. Grindr is under the watchful eye of the Apple Store, so even with the 18+ rating, they have to enforce Steve Jobs' lingering puritanical standard (which I doubt even that Tim Cook queen will change).

iOS 4 iOS only. Not a bigot, just a preference.

Instead: Choose a pic that will grab your target's attention in the middle of the 20-person grid you'll be presented in. You can send as many x-rated pics as you like through the chat feature.

Try to return a compliment with a compliment.

DON'T harass guys who won't answer your messages right away. The general rule among guys on Grindr (which I don't agree with at all) is "If I don't answer, I'm not interested." Also, some guys only sign on once a day or every few days. Maybe he hasn't even seen your message yet.

A lot can happen in twenty minutes.

Instead: send no more than a couple of messages sans response (and a pic or two if pics are part of your initiation game). Then move on to the next guy. His response may be a pleasant surprise by the time it comes.

Your point is as crystal clear as your hole.

Now, this is, by no means, an exhaustive list. Hell, I could rattle off 10 more DON’Ts just from my personal pet peeves (like sending your ass pic as your opening line). But people have diverse Grindr goals that require different methods. No matter what you're looking for, these helpful hints will no doubt enhance your user experience and help you find what you're looking for.

What are some of your Grindr DON'Ts? Leave a comment and let me know.

Get more Grindr tips right here, sluts.

- TheBlackoutBlog Man

Naked Boys, Sneaky Hat!

Facebook absolutely amazes me sometimes. When I post a photo of go-go boys in their underwear holding each other, Facebook yanks it down and gives me a warning.

Newsflash: have you heard of The Sneaky Hat?

It's a new fan page on Facebook that has me flummoxed. It is featuring FULLY NAKED GUYS AND GIRLS. Sometimes they're covering up their junk with a HAT, and sometimes they're not (my GOD I've seen balls!) Do you get it? The hat is sneaky because it's creeping up on dude's cocks.

It's on Facebook right now, and it's hella popular. At first I thought it was a joke. Or another virus. Is that the case? I don't know. Is this some huge porn demonstration to allow adult film stars and escorts back on Facebook? I have no idea.

I have gone ahead and curated the best of the best, as far as I'm concerned, of these pictures, and attached them here. Beneath them is a link to The Sneaky Hat's fan page where it will probably stay for a few more minutes until Facebook gets their shit together and realizes that erections and vaginas are being publicly displayed there.

Well, you've seen it here first! Enjoy.

Wanna see more? Check out The Sneaky Hat on Facebook

- Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

STILL MORE Lame Things Gay Promoters Do - DJ EDITION: A +1 Guest Post

The following post wasn't written by me, but it WAS inspired by me! (And by my promoter buddy Daniel Nardicio). Today's post is a guest blog written by sexy east coast DJ Jason Royce. 

If you party in DC or Philly or Jersey, chances are you've shaken your booty to his mixed and mashed tunes at LEAST a bunch of times.

In today's post, Jason continues where I left off yesterday with another rant about the shady/questionable behaviors of gay nightlife promoters. Let's just call this the "DJ Edition," shall we?

In the end, all I can say is: PREACH!


Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

---

Justin struck a nerve with me yesterday when he posted his own followup to Daniel Nardicio's recent post for the Village Voice called "The 10 Lamest Things Party Promoters Do." Justin's post, "Ten MORE Lame Things That Gay Party Promoters Do," definitely hit the nail on the head as far as annoying, and downright stupid, things that promoters tend to do. And in all fairness, Justin admitted to fucking up a time or two and committing some of the very sins he has on his list. All promoters do it.

But as I was reading I couldn't help but think of a few things he may have missed. Maybe he's never been dumb enough to do some of the things I was thinking about? Maybe he did and just forgot about them? Either way, I certainly have seen some promoters over the years do some ridiculous things in order to make their party, the club, and more importantly their egos, seem larger than life.

Lets first go with the topic of DJs, shall we?

Tonight's party features "TOP RATED," "SUPERSTAR," "#1," "AWARD WINNING," and the one that irks me the most of all "PRODUCER/REMIXER," deejay so and so. Have you ever had to ask yourself, "Who?"

Top rated according to what? Did this unknown DJ somehow beat out Tiesto or Calderone for this year's top spot on the DJ Times (or pick another reputable industry mag) Top 100 list? What the fuck does Top Rated even mean?

Superstar? Is he a superstar in your own mind because you think he's cute or looks good when he deejays shirtless but cant mix two songs to save his life? What basement did this kid come from?

Did he really work with GaGa or Katy Perry IN the studio on a single or remix? Or did he use his newly purchased Mac in his bedroom using someone else's loops and a downloaded a capella?

The point is this: Every club has a DJ.

Stop over-hyping the DJ and be honest about their resume and experience and don't set people up for what could be a shitty night of music. DJs, especially new DJs desperate for a club gig, exaggerate about their experience and lie about their past gigs all the time just to get a gig, and if a promoter falls for those lies, and then advertise a "SUPERSTAR DJ" only to have the worst train crash accident in history occur at their party...well, you see where I'm going with this.

And here is another thought: If you, the promoter, are going to hire a DJ based solely off the demo they emailed you (which of course sounds perfect because they made it using a computer), and if you've not done your homework on them and have never, ever heard them play live to a packed club before, you'll have only yourself to blame when the boo's drown out the terrible music on the dancefloor.

The same can be applied to dancers and bartenders and performers/drag queens. "THE CITY'S HOTTEST" so and so. Hottest by whose standards? Did the HOT police certify someone with a stamp of approval? Everyone has different tastes in dancers, for example, so don't advertise HOT HOT HOT when you may have UGLY MESS UGLY on every bar and dance box.

The same goes for bartenders. Don't advertise hot bartenders when you have nothing but old, tired, career bartenders with wrinkles who hate their lives because they've gone nowhere. Dancers and bartenders add to ambiance and we all love eye candy, but please let people decide for themselves if the sights are worthy of coming back next week to hopefully get that hotties number.

Lets move on to:

Promoters who don't provide and/or make sure staff (especially straight staff at a traditionally straight club hosting a gay party) are welcoming, courteous and professional. We've all ran into this problem at some point. If you, as a promoter, cannot negotiate things like this with the venue, then you better make sure you have enough gay staff to make up the difference, or move on to another club that understands and is willing to work with you to accommodate your patrons. Enough said.

VIP: Everyone is a paying customer and wants to have a good time. A promoter who offers VIP better be prepared to understand they risk alienating other customers by treating a few "elite" people in special ways. A promoter who puts himself behind a velvet rope at a table with champagne and some trashy men/women, or in the center of the room like he's a king, and/or only allows his friends into a certain part of the club, not only looks like a douchebag but the arrogance is a huge turnoff to people who paid to get into the party to have a good time.

And did I mention these are the same people who ultimately helped that same douchy promoter make a few extra bucks at the end of his fabulous night? Everyone should be treated equally regardless of their "cuteness" or tight fitting jeans they are wearing that night. If a promoter thinks his "friends" are going to come back next week and actually pay to get in along with the "uglies" then he's sadly mistaken.

The same can be applied to promoters (or a drag queen with a clipboard and "list") who like to walk outside the club and pull certain boys from the line to get in for free ahead of others who have been waiting longer, with money. If people are willing to wait, and willing to pay, they don't need to be pissed off because Studio 54 suddenly reopened. Atleast make everyone wait in line and then take care of friends extremely discretely at the cash window.

And finally:

Don't be "that" promoter who gets trashed part way through the night and cant see their event through to the end in a responsible way. Or the promoter who disappears for hours at a time only to reappear later with coke residue under their nose smelling of poppers, lube and tequila. Not cute, and definitely not professional. I'm paying to come to your party, so the least you can do is work your fucking ass off, all night, to make sure I have the best time ever with friends.

I'll be back next week if you can get it right, douchebag.



- Jason

Ten MORE Lame Things That Gay Party Promoters Do

One of my favorite gay nightlife promoters on the east coast has got to be Daniel Nardicio. He's the head of marketing for Playgirl and he throws some of the nastiest parties in NYC.

Here's the deal with Daniel: he's an honest, real, upfront, and super-smart guy. Aside from my partner, Alan Picus, Daniel is the next most inspirational dude I know on the scene.

Recently, Daniel wrote a post for the Village Voice's Michael Musto called "The 10 Lamest Things Party Promoters Do." (You can read it here.)

It's true! I'm even guilty of some of them! For shame, Justin Luke! Regardless, my ONE problem with Daniel's post is that it was too short. I can definitely come up with another 10 lame things that gay promoters do. And that's exactly what I'll be doing here.

NOTE: As I said, I have, at times, been guilty of a few of these. They're easy traps to fall into! So don't fall over yourself telling me how I'm a hypocrite. I'm aware that I've made a few of these mistakes. And I'm WORKING on ABSOLVING my sins. Trust.

Anywho... do you think 20 is STILL not enough? Well feel free to leave additional ones in the comments section. If we get enough of them, I can ALWAYS write a third post.


10. CRAZY LINES!
I can't take it when a promoter is throwing a relatively brand new party, and they promise NUTZO PSYCHOTIC LORD OF THE FLIES-STYLE LINES! Arrive early! Or the line will be so long it will stretch to the Bronx and you won't get to the door until you're forty and far too old to be allowed in!

One: I'm calling BULLSHIT on you. No party has lines that long. And the ones that do don't mind if you arrive late and have to wait to get in - it makes them look good. Two: this is Risky Business (without Tom Cruise, or underwear). If you promise BATSHIT FUCKAZOID LINES and I show up to your party and the only people inside are your paid (or, unlucky them, unpaid) staff, then I will never trust you again.

Saying there will be lines will not guarantee you lines. So stop saying it.


9. LADY GAGA WAS HERE (I THINK?)!
If some huge celebrity stopped by your party to ask for directions on how to get to another location, you really shouldn't milk the fact that they were there. But a lot of promoters do. KATY PERRY CAME LAST YEAR! MISSY E STOPPED BY TO USE THE BATHROOM! JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE TRIPPED OUTSIDE WHILE JOGGING BY!

No. Just. No. I care if the celebrity WILL be there TONIGHT. That's cool! I want to go to there and see them being there and maybe hear them sing. But if that celebrity happened by a few years ago, what the fuck do I care about that? That doesn't tell me that the party you're throwing tonight is any good, it just tells me you're fresh out of ideas when it comes to marketing your event.

I mean, would you eat at a restaurant that said "APPROVED BY THE BOARD OF HEALTH FIVE YEARS AGO!" No. No you wouldn't. You want to know what the Board of Health said about it THIS YEAR.

The far worse version of this is when a promoter CLAIMS a celebrity came to their party, but no one except said promoter can vouch for their presence. Just because whatever drug you were doing made you THINK that you saw the cast of Glee doesn't mean they were actually there. 


8. FEATURING A LIVE PERFORMANCE BY A COMPLETE NOBODY!
Oh my gosh! Marianna MoreCock just came out with a new EP! She recorded it in her basement and her dad totally sold three copies to some of his co-workers. Does anyone care about Melissa Mellancamp, or whatever her name is? NO!

But man, some promoters might! You get the promo and it's all MARLENE MISSISSIPPI ALBUM RELEASE PARTY! Featuring a live performance of her new hit single, "THIS IS MY NEW HIT SINGLE (BITCHES!)" She'll stay and sign autographs! She's REALLY REALLY HUGE!

These parties never work! Why? Because nobody knows who Mileena Merryweather is, so you have to spend the whole week CONVINCING them that she's a huge celebrity, and that her upcoming album "I Edited This On Garageband (BITCHES!)" is the must-have of the year.

It isn't! Nobody cares! Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't feature new talent, we do that all the time at BoiParty. But we don't give them a full promo and scream about them. We include them as entertainment and build a larger theme apart from them. Don't make a mountain out of a Maria Molehill.


7. OPEN BAR... I MEAN KINDA OPEN BAR... IS THERE AN OPEN BAR?
Open Bars are one of the greatest inventions in nightlife... when they're done honestly. In a city where a thimbleful of turpentine-flavored well vodka can be priced at nine dollars, a chance to drink for free (even if it's well!) is something any penny pinching (or economically minded) gay can get behind.

But only when done honestly. And, from what I hear, a lot of Open Bars are NOT done honestly. If you're going to throw an open bar, do it the right way! Don't say it starts at eleven, and then instruct your doorman to start letting early arrivals in at eleven thirty. Don't hire a solo bartender, break his legs, tie one arm behind his back and make him serve drinks with his eyes closed to limit the amount of booze he pours. And don't add a sudden rule that's not stated upfront (Did I say open bar? I meant Open WELL Bar. And ONLY Tylenol-flavored Traveler's Club vodka. And ONLY until the first bottle is half-way empty).

If you advertise an Open Bar, make good on your promise. NO ONE likes being lied to.


6. WE'RE RE-INVENTING NIGHTLIFE FOREVARRR!
Okay, we're selling parties. I get it. So we're going to use LOTS OF SUPER-AMAZING GAME-CHANGING OVER-PROMISING COCK BLOWJOBBING effusive language.

Fine. Go ahead and do it. But there's one thing you should NEVER do: claim that your party is going to CHANGE NIGHTLIFE FOREVER. That you're going to COCKFUCK THE ASSHOLE OF NIGHTLIFE AND MAKE IT A BRAND NEW BITCH FOR THE REST OF TIME!

Because, in all honesty, that's not going to happen.

Is your party at a place where booze is served? Is there a DJ spinning some kind of music? Will people be there drinking and/or dancing? Well, then, you haven't really reinvented nightlife, now have you? You're following all the rules by the book. And there is nothing wrong with this! These are tried-and-true formulas that bring in people and make a party fun!

Until you throw a party on a zeppelin featuring a live performance by a group of dancing penguins and music played on a bunch of classic Coke bottles, you haven't re-invented nightlife one bit.


5. FREE GIVEAWAYS! I MEAN ONE FREE GIVEAWAY! I MEAN HALF A FREE GIVEAWAY!
Giveaways are AWESOME! Nothing beats going to a party and learning that there's the possibility of us getting free shit. Whether it's porn DVDs, CDs, passes to another party, whatever! We LOVE that!

But be smart about what you're offering, and make good on your promises. Don't tell me there will be ALBUM GIVEAWAYS when you really only bought a single copy of the Kelly Clarkson CD at Best Buy on your way to the party. And DON'T promise ALBUM GIVEAWAYS if you really only have a single copy of Katy Perry's "Firework" radio edit that came attached to an old Billboard Magazine you found in your bedroom. And don't say you're having PORN GIVEAWAYS if you only have one expired, no-longer-functioning "FREE MONTH OF PORN" coupon you got at someone else's event.

Imagine if someone invited you to a buffet, and you and your friends got there to find a single hamburger on a plate. You'd be pretty pissed, right? What are you going to do? Cut the hamburger like it's a pie?

Of course not.

Be smart! Look at the cost of your giveaway, and the size of your crowd. Either have a LOT of cheaper giveaways, or a few higher-value ones. 


4. WALL INVASION!
There is space for promotion on Facebook. Namely, groups, fan pages, your own profile, and event invites. What's NOT cool is when a (usually amateur/newbie) promoter starts copy-pasting TO YOUR WALL.

That's NOT okay, folks. That's about as dictionary-definition as you can get where SPAM is involved. It's like someone knocking on my apartment door and then screaming in my face with a megaphone "HEY SEXY WANNA COME TO MY SUPER HOT PARTY TONIGHT? CRAZY LINES! MARYJANE McGILLICUTTY PERFORMS! FREE PORN GIVEAWAYS!"

... Before he slams my door, walks down the hall to the next one, and does the same thing all over again.

Keep your promoting to your own pages/groups/profile. That way, if people don't care for it, they can un-friend you, leave the group, etc. It's just the right thing to do.



3. TONIGHT'S GONNA BE PACKED!
If promoters were telling the truth, every party on every night of the week at every bar and club would be so fucking packed that the lines outside (CRAZY LINES!) would never go away and the people inside would be forcibly pushed out of the windows and up through the ceilings.

Listen. Stop saying your party is going to be packed. Unless you stumbled upon a time machine and stopped by the future to check out the state of your event, you just can't be sure about that.

UNLESS it is: Pride Weekend, Fourth of July Weekend, Halloween Weekend, Thanksgiving Weekend, New Years Eve, you pre-sold hundreds of tickets, or a housewife is coming to perform at your party.

Other than that? You have no basis on which to prove this statement. Just because your party was bumpin' last week doesn't mean it will bump again this week. And the worst thing that can happen is a bunch of people stopping by only to find a big gay grandpa graveyard. 


2. ALL CAPS! ALL FUCKING CAPS! AHHHHHHH! ROFLOLBBQBRBOMG!
God almighty. GOD ALMIGHTY. Enough with the caps! Please! I beg of you! Notice how I'm using exclamation points and NOT all capital letters!

Maybe back in the days when web pages had animated cats and MIDI songs all caps were cool. Back when you were awesome because your MySpace page was such a fucking mess that it took twenty minutes to load.

Not anymore! All caps means all ignored. I'm not going to read all those big letters, they make my eyes, and Baby Jesus, cry. Put some thought into your promoting and write in full sentences.

HOT SEXY SUPER COCK BALLS BUTT TWINK PARTY! VIP! FREE! SEX!

Doesn't work. It just doesn't. It's the equivalent of an unhinged lunatic screaming obscene and confused things in your face.

Rather, might I suggest that you selectively capitalize CERTAIN WORDS. It works much better. It draws the eye. It doesn't stab that eye and cause lots of blood to flow all over the place. Give it a shot!


1. LYING 
I have developed a quote since I started working in nightlife: "Lying works, but only once."

If I tell you my party is hot and that Lady Gaga will be there duetting with the resurrected cadaver of Michael Jackson, you will (most likely) come out in droves. But when Gaga doesn't show, and MJ remains dead and buried, you will never trust me, ever again.

Nor should you.

This is why I refuse to lie when I promote. If someone asks me how a party will be tonight, and I think it might be a slow night, I won't tell them it'll be SUPER PACKED. Because I won't promise something that I can't deliver on... because that puts your trust in me in jeopardy, and if I don't have your trust, I don't have anything.

This goes for ALL promotions.

Don't say the club is closed for renovations when the truth is it kicked your party out (especially when you can WALK BY THE CLUB AND SEE IT'S OPEN).

Don't say the party was packed with hot 20-somethings when there are easy-to-find photos from the night and the bar is empty with no more than 20 guys, all who are over the age of 50.

Don't say you or your party is the #1 blank blank blank in a blank blank, because you cannot prove it. And in order to tell the truth in that scenario, you'll ultimately end up with a line like: "The Hottest Monday Night Party At A Mid-Size Bar in New York City in the Past Three Months!" And, really, how impressive is that? (It's not impressive).

---

And there you have it! Thanks to Daniel Nardicio for the inspiration, and the permission to write this. And thanks to my big boss, Alan P for teaching me the ropes, and what not to do.

xoxo Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

Lady Gaga Gets Decapitated (And Continues Singing)

Did you catch Lady Gaga's performance of "Marry The Night" on The X Factor in the UK?

No? Well you best be checking it out!

Apparently Marrying the Night is a god-awful process that results in terrible deformation, because Mama Gags came out in a giant headless torso, with her head popping out of the stomach like she's the next coming of Aliens.

Oh Lady Gaga... god bless your strange performancewear. I hope you sing with your head coming out of a turkey's anus on your Thanksgiving special this year.




- Justin Luke
BoiParty.com

Sexy Shirts for Sexy Gays

Let's face it: I'm a t-shirt guy. I LOVE them! Fuck buttons and zippers and sweaters. Give me a good, cute tee and I'm set to go.

Imagine my excitement when I discovered designer Ben Hart's new t-shirt company oopsy daisy, inc.

The designs are SEXY, EDGY, and definitely EYE-CATCHING. Plus, the process Ben undergoes to make each shirt makes them 100% unique. No two shirts are the same.

I was lucky enough to grab Gorgeous Gay Ben for a few quick seconds to talk about his new company, and got you some info.

Check it out, and GRAB A TEE TODAY!


Okay, Ben... there are SO many t-shirt companies that are out there... tell me what makes oopsy daisy, inc different.

What sets oopsy daisy, inc apart is the designs themselves, all of which are originally cut out of paper (construction or card stock, usually), and then copied, cut into a stencil, and screen printed by hand on American Apparel shirts..  One thing I dislike about many t-shirts is that while many of them have beautiful/cool/funky/etc/etc images, I find them to be too...  t-shirty.  And often over designed. 

My initial aim wasn't to make cool t-shirts,  it was just to make art, and t-shirts happen to be a great vehicle (and frankly, probably the best way for the most people to see it).  I guess at the end of day, whether I intended to be or not, I'm in "fashion" now...  but really I consider myself an outsider, and I hope that translates into a fresh perspective.

And where did the name oopsy daisy come from?
I actually had no idea what my company name was going to be at first, and then I happened to make the original "oopsy daisy" design (that silly little flower...  how'd that pot get on his head??).  It quickly became one of my favorites, and the title seemed to somehow fit my design method, in which random scraps and accidental cuts somehow come together into a cohesive design.  And who can resist that daisy?  What a silly, unexpected predicament he seems to have gotten himself into! Whoops!!

For those who haven't seen them, how would you describe the look and style of your designs?

I usually describe them as contemporary cut-out art often infused with humor.  Whimsical pop art!  I often find myself playing with empty space, and the letting the eye do the work to create an image or impression.  I like images that make my brain hurt.  But a Japanese fan once told me "Every tee is so pop and cute!" which I think about sums them up!


What inspires your designs? For instance - what's up with Le Franch? And Second Star?

Well, besides some... *ahem* herbal stimulation... anything and everything inspires me! Sometimes it's just a word or a phrase, and sometimes I have no idea and I just shift around some scraps of paper until I see something.  Le Franch was created after a friend of mine put up a facebook status about a trip he was taking, I think it was along the lines of "Vespas, impressionists, cigarettes dangling precariously on lower lips... Paris, here we come!!!" I liked the image of the cigarette, and added the tag "le franch"...  that sounds french, right? I didn't pay attention in class. 

The second star to the right tee was born out of a new musical I recently did off-broadway called "Peter and I."  I was playing J.M Barrie (the guy who wrote Peter Pan) and one of my lines was a Barrie quote: "Stars are beautiful, but they must not take an active part in anything.  They must just look on forever.  It is a punishment put on them for something they did so long ago that no star now knows what it was."  In the show it was referencing a gay character who committed suicide, and the image of a "star" (in this case a young, brilliant gay man) who has everything to offer but feels he can't continue on in the world struck me.  But I also just love Peter Pan, and wanted to create something that was both sweet and a little ominous (with it's 'hook moon'... symbolism or something).  One thing I learned while doing the show is that Peter Pan is actually a MUCH darker story than I ever realized.

What kind of guy should be wearing oopsy daisy? And why?

The first thing I realized when I started wearing my own shirts out is that they are eye catchers.  If you want to suddenly find everyone checking you out on a subway car...  I highly recommend oopsy daisy.


What sort of designs are you working on right now that aren't yet on sale?

Oh, I have piles.  There's a little bit of a waiting list... probably next up are some of my more skeletal designs.  But to get more of an idea, just check out the "designs" section of the oopsy daisy, inc site.  I'd love for people to let me know what they like!  I also do custom designs, so if any readers have an idea that they think would mesh with my aesthetic, just let me know and I'll see what I can do!


Can we expect more than shirts from oopsy daisy, inc. in the future?

Absolutely.  If it can be printed on...  I will do it.  Totes? Totes. I'll be adding products soon, but again, let me know what the public wants!  I also have a line of decidedly dark greeting cards that I'll be selling soon.


Do you have any design heroes? If so, who and why?
Nope.  I know of artists that have done similar work or have similar methods (Matisse of course, Béatrice Coron, to name a few) but paper cutting is something that I stumbled onto completely by accident while trying to design a logo for another business.  I've created the process as I've gone along, and at the end of the day, I've just been trying to make images that I like.  Luckily for me, other people seem to enjoy them too!


The million dollar question: How can WE get our hands on Oopsy Daisy shirts?

http://www.oopsydaisyinc.net!

I would recommended first checking out my original paper designs, and then click on "buy" to get a closer look at the shirts themselves.  And please, spread the word!  oopsy daisy, inc has been nothing if not a labor of love for me, and if I can share some of that love with just a couple of your readers, it will all be worth it!


So do it, boys. You'll be seeing me modeling off these tees in the coming weeks. They're just too sexy to leave on the shelf!

xo Justin Luke
BoiParty.com