Tuesday, April 3, 2012
The Top 10 Things I Hate
Usually I like to keep things positive and lovey-dovey here on Justin + 1. I like to entertain! I like to spread love, teach lessons to younger gays, and share things that everyone will enjoy.
But, dammit, I hate some things too! I noticed there's been a significant lack in rants on this blog as of late. I have been accused of being opinionated... and it's true! I have opinions! Some of which people don't quite like.
So I'm gonna air them all out in one post. Right here. Then I'll go back to dating and partying tips and all of that fun stuff.
- Justin Luke
THINGS JUSTIN LUKE HATES (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER)
I liked all of 1/2 an episode of this claptrap. Since then it's gone downhill. Downhill so far that it's created an opposite hill, one that stretches many, many miles underground. Oh Glee, whatever happened to you? That trailer looked so promising! Now you are the equivalent of a porno film. Just substitute the sex scenes for random songs, and the lines of dialogue for dumber lines of dialogue. No one should watch this show. No one. Don't encourage them.
2. REALITY TV
It doesn't matter what kind of show, I don't like any of them. Whether you're pawning things, fishing for crabs, driving on an icy road in a truck, living in a house with a bunch of other randoms, a mobster's wife, a mobster's child, a resident of the Jersey Shore or a master of couture on the Jersey Shore. DOESN'T MATTER. It's all so bland to me. I can only see weaves yanked from heads so many times. I can only see so many drag queens lip sync for their lives. If I wanted to see these things, I would go see them in real life, since they are real. I DO see drag queens live, and love them. And I may someday go see an Ice Road Trucker. Just because. Give me something scripted. Something funny. Something GOOD. Thank you. Good day sir.
3. RAIN AND SNOW
Fuck you, bad weather! Simply put, I don't like getting wet when clothed. Jeans. T-shirt. Jacket. A bag I'm carrying. I resent being soggy and sodden. It's not my thing. Rain or snow is enough to make me depressed, causing me to lock myself in my apartment so that I can sit and stew and curse out the window.
I don't like these at all. I am all for behaving as you please (so long as others aren't hurt). But the second you behave one way, and give shit to people for behaving in the same way... then I get Incredible Hulk-y, complete with green skin and the smashing of things. NO HYPOCRITES! Monitor your actions, and be okay with having them turned around on you. Then we all good.
5. MONSTER ENERGY DRINK
This is the WORST energy drink EVER. Actually, Rockstar is pretty terrible too. They taste like cough syrup, and don't even take care of my cough. It's Redbull or nothing. I'll just run to Starbucks and grab a coffee to chug if I need energy, and all there is in the club or bar is one of these "other" energy drinks.
6. THE MTA
The only people who love the Metropolitan Transit Authority are the fatty fat fat cats at the top who are raking in all the money while we sell our kidneys to afford monthly MetroCards that won't work in their busted turnstiles and that won't get us on a train because their trains are never running. For this reason I only take cabs or use my feet in order to get to places. Brooklyn and Queens are all but off-limits, since the MTA REALLY works hard to never service those areas properly. For this reason, I don't tend to travel very far in the city. Luckily, I live near Chelsea and Hell's Kitchen, so it's not that much of a loss.
7. RAW TOMATOES AND FIELD GREENS
Worst things ever created. They are bitter. They are sour. They get caught in your teeth. And the tomatoes even smell like puke. Keep field greens away from anything I'll be eating, and keep raw tomatoes out of a 3 mile radius of me.
8. THE PEOPLE AT THE HEAD OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
Talk about a bunch of bullies. I'm talking the Pope. I'm talking Cardinal Timothy Dolan. I'm talking the pundits on televisions around the world. They hide behind religion to avoid responsibility for hundreds of their clergy raping young boys and to avoid taxes, and then they spin around and swing religion like a battleax to get their way - whether it's involving same gender marriage or women's reproductive rights. Whatever happened to feeding and clothing the poor and being all about love? Must have forgotten all of that troublesome responsibility when Jesus died.
9. FOX NEWS
Well, it's a coin toss. I might LOVE Fox News because watching it, for me, is akin to a straight man watching football while his favorite team loses. I scream! I yell! My boyfriend gets turned on by the screaming and yelling! Every bloated sack of breadcrumbs that makes up the Fox News "journalistic" team inspires both anger and hatred in me. Hearing people I know talking about how Fox News is "unbiased and fair" gets me even angrier. How can people not see the truth? I don't know. Whatever. They can keep watching, and I'll keep laughing when I watch the Daily Show's weekly recaps of the 24-hour televised idiocy.
No, not all republicans. Just the ones I read about all the time. The senators and pundits and everyone on that level. The ones screaming about how Obama has ruined America (he hasn't) how gays will ruin America (they won't) and how they will fix America (they've yet to do this). Why do they still exist? Same reason that Fox News does, is my guess.