GOSSIP + SHADE: Jessica's Still Fat, Denise Richards Did Something And NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED THIS WEEK

Tuesdays at Justin + 6 are Gossip + Shade with Long Island Mo'lita and Adopted Kennedy, Clay Adam Wade. Blind items, anonymous tips, and additional shade are welcome. 
-----------------------------

Do you hear that whistle? It’s tea time bitches.

I’m spilling the top three hottest gossip pieces for you this week.

3.  Precious Jessica Simpson landed yesterday in New York on a private jet with a weight capacity JUST large enough to lift her off the ground and safely into the Big Apple, where I’m sure she’s crying next to a Chicken and Rice cart.  The Chicken of the Sea Queen is in town to shoot an episode for Katie Couric’s new God awful show to flaunt her “post baby body,” which has looked the same since she discovered the Chili Cookoff and mom denim four years ago.  When asked about her progress Jessica, who is, by the way, the only person who sounds more like a poodle screaming in pain when they sing than Mariah Carey, responded, “I’m no supermodel.”  For once I have nothing else to say….

2.   Denise Richards (you can tell this week is slow) was seen taking ex Charlie Sheen and professional crack whore Brooke Mueller’s twins to the Farmer’s Market this past week.  Like… what?!?!  What is wrong with these people?  They swap semen, vaginal juices, partners, kids, diseases.  My God.  I think we have successfully found the new cast of The Jersey Shore.  There’s more bipolar disorder, secrecy and polygamy in that circle of people than in Mitt Romney’s entire family.

1.   I give up lol.  My last story is that… THERE IS NO FUCKING GOSSIP THIS WEEK.  Listed on x17online’s list of this week’s hottest stories are “Selena Gomez Arrives At LAX in Sweats,” and “Kiefer Sutherland ‘Didn’t See’ VMAs.”  Holy shit!

Now watch my shade of the week which is about people who try to up-shade me (it’s a play on upstage, okay?) (which is also kind of a play on words, stage, play, haha. okay I’m done)



Stay shady, lady.
- CLAY